So far, I haven't had a majorly embarrassing cellphone incident, but I know it's just a matter of time. I have an HTC Incredible, which is short for Incredibly Horrible. It has an annoying habit of re-routing my texts. Oddly, many of the re-directs of my texts end up going to Andy, Co-Dependent. He's received passwords for bank accounts, grocery lists and once, when I actually was texting him on the way to meeting him at a wine tasting, the phone sent the same message 11 times. He logically assumed I'd started drinking without him.
Which is probably what you've assumed right about now. But this does relate to improv, I swear. At least, in my mind it relates. Your experience may vary.
Sometimes in improv scenes, your brain gets mixed up, and the wires get crossed and what you think you're saying isn't what you're saying at all. You might give your scene partner a name and then, in an attempt to add more information, say that you've enjoyed spending the afternoon with them because they always make manboobs better. Of course, you know you meant to say Mondays. But you said manboobs, and now you're both stuck with manboobs.
Not literally, of course.
In an autocorrect fail situation, you can type OMG, LMAO, WTF and (hopefully) type what you really meant. In an improv scene, you can't. All you and your partner can do is stay calm and present, and justify the mistake. You can't ignore it; trust me, the audience hears it when you say "manboobs." So maybe your partner says, "I know you've been feeling really insecure about your manboobs lately, but to tell you the truth, I find them incredibly sexy." Ewww. Or you say, "Nobody else understands the pain of having manboobs, except you because you have them too. We're kindred spirits." Amazingly enough, you now have a scene that's about your relationship, whatever it may be, and it's all because your brain misfired and you stayed calm and justified it.
Naturally, we teach all about staying calm and in the moment and justifying in Held2gether improv classes. Which is good, because you'll probably need those skills for when you accidentally text your boss that you got a great deal at Staples on penis.
Oh, and if you get a text from me expressing my undying love and commenting inappropriately on random body parts, ignore it. It's for Viet. Thanks.
*NOT family friendly. And thanks to Nate for sharing.
By Sonnjea Blackwell
